Best NPC quotes


#1

Hokkaido:

“Watch where you’re going you bag of dicks!” - The resort security NPC outside of the of Staff Quarters that walks up the stairs to the Sushi Restaurant.


#2

Sala Malekum. Want a lamp? These are dark times no?


#3

“Come in! Come in!
I’m so honored by your visit in my humble shop. I can see you have an eye for high quality products.”


#4

Penelope Graves: "What? You want a kiss?"
When standing right in her face.


#5

Oh yes please.

“Please, please be an orgy”, “Someone’s being a real nuisance” and “Bye bye, bye bye boo-boo” are my definite favorites. :,)

inb4 Rocco’s sister


#6

@GuLe
All the credit to the creator of the video for getting this jewel on screen:


#7

When crouching "HEY act your age man! What are you 46, 48?


#8

“Don’t shoot! I-I’m like Jesus or something!”


#9

“I’m like Jesus! I heal people!” A good one.


#10

Oh yeah, that’s really funny too (because of the numbers). :smiley:


#11

I forgot to mention “Please, please leave me be, I-I just had my teeth done!”


#12

“Eeeaaggghh you bitch, I’m gonna get you for this!!”

“Yeah, you don’t deserve his autograph, you deserve–poop in a bag.”

Gets me every time.


#13

Lol just heard the orgy line today for the first time today. :joy:


#14

While wearing the Requiem Suit…“Is that Pitbull?”


#15

I have to also mention the most retarded conversation in the whole game. It’s in AHBoS when some guy talks about a Frenchman looking for a fortune teller and the other guy wants to date his sister, so bad that it’s funny. I want to know what guys at IO thought when they were writing that dialogue.


#16

I was dressed as the priest in landslide and I bumped abiatti, he said “f**k off you smell like death”


#17

Lol i always imagined them saying that for the sapienza outfit.


#18

Damn, again I remember a brilliant quote I forgot about.


#19

“Oh shit, oh shit. Oh fuck fuck shit!”


#20

“Bald, white, stone-faced like MMMMM” gets me every time.