Well,this is how it went
In school just before our last class I asked her if she had 5 minutes after school because I had to talk to her about something.
So she said "Sure,no problem"
We went outside of the school and stood there in front of it,she was in a hurry and couldn't go anywhere more private.
So she asked me what did I want to talk to her about.
I turned into a stuttering mess.I couldn't say anything,I was really trying but the words just couldn't come out.
She said "Well,I'd like to help you but I have no idea what's the problem.Do you have a problem?"
I said "Nah it's just something about you"
It was probably the worst thing I could say
I tried to say what I really feel several more times but I didn't say anything at all.Just words,couldnt even make a sentence
So she asked me if she did anything to hurt me or upset me.I of course said no and tried to explain the situation.In the end I said
" I can't do this.I just can't,sorry"
She said she feels kinda stupid because she knows its something about her yet has no idea what I wanted to say.
She told me I can send her a message when I get home if that would make me feel easier.I agreed.
And thats it.I almost started crying there and then.I was both angry at myself and super sad because I missed this chance.I just had a really bad feeling during that conversation that we'd never talk again and that stopped me from doing anything.
I guess I'll have to send her a message as much as I dont like doing that when its something important to talk about.I cant do this any other way it seems.