Best NPC quotes


Maybe he’s one of the actors breaking the 4th wall, and you just legit killed the actor playing Jasper Knight


I always thought so! I mean,how could he have survived that,even in a simulation? His head went through the ceiling!


He’s probably fine, just a minor bruise and a few broken bones, and maybe a fractured skull.


I mean,he had enough strenght to keep screaming even AFTER going through the roof,so I think maybe somewhere,around the cold ICA base somewhere in Antartica judging by the cold…Jasper lives…they used to call him egg-head…but now…at night…while it snows…he sneaks into peoples houses…as they sleep…he watches them…ahah…studies them even. Then,one night a YEAR HE STRIKES…them with gifts if they behaved well

Santa Claus Origins

Coming Soon


I hope you all feel bad now /s


One of my favorites. The ways he says it and that “EXTRA” get´s me everytime :joy:
-Sneakin’ around like that makes you look EXTRA suspicious. Just sayin’- Ezra Berg


Been getting mastery on Colorado pro, on one playthrough I was up the water tower and was spotted. Entered combat. All I could do was try to hide and pick them off until it was safe to leave. One NPC said something like “Quasimodo has retreated to the tower”.


“Bladdy wankin’ 'ell!”


sorry for none specifics and if its already been one here, but there a convo on the Paris level near an entry to the fashion show between a male and female couple, the insecure lady complaining she’s not getting enough(sex) saying things like, “see she’s pretty and thin, your looking at her arent you” goes on to say, something like " if I have to get hold of your pelvis and push back and forth myself, so god help me I will"


It’s a mother and son! She’s trying to get her son to date a model XD


I was going on a rampage in Hokkaido and there was this one guard totally oblivious to what was going on. A doctor runs up to him and says ‘why are you just standing there like the village idiot’ :rofl:


That’s a reference to the smurfs


Not sure if this was in Absolution or this one, but I recall some guy saying:
“Look who’s been playing a bit too much Assassin’s Creed.” when I ran and vaulted over an obstacle.

Don’t remember that many from this though; but I remember everything from Absolution - so hilarious.


AFAIK, they say that if you’re specifically wearing the Plague Doctor disguise from Sapienza.


Ahh, I see, thanks for reminding me who it was. Cool man.


"Okay, okay. Bring you back a bunch of photos of me in front of stuff."
The delivery on that line is absolutely perfect!


Once, I was watching @mendietinha stream and he bumped into a woman, to which she replied with ‘Do you beat kids too ?’

That wasn’t the funny part, it was mendie replying casually : ‘‘Yeah, occasionally. Why ?’’


One Waiter in Bangkok: “Boob blogger on table 12”.


God i knew it, this goddam teens, drinking and riding hacked scooters… :joy:


Hitman GO quote
Ah yeah, love puzzle games on the phone.
Never heard of this balled, barcoded master assassin before, but this game is fun.
There is no violence. And what’s a Silverballerthingy? :laughing: