Hitman Moments IRL


When you’re called up out of the blue to do a phone survey and they ask for your name, just tell them that names are for friends, so you don’t need one. Then hang up.


I was out driving earlier today and the car infront of me had the Hitman insignia decal on his rear window like this one

Funny thing is, I have a similar one on my car too. I honked the horn at him at a red light and he looked at me funny.

Then when the light was green and I made my way infront of him, he must have seen mine because he honked as well :joy: I looked through my rear view mirror and he give me a thumbs up lmao :sunglasses::+1:

Ahh… “Another Brother…” Lol


The other week i thought i’d help the missus with the dinner and i asked what she wanted me to do, she asked me to keep stirring the sauce in the pan, quick as a flash i replied “sure thing boss, i’ll give it some love”.

Needless to say she did not get it but it kinda made my day… she’ll probably leave me soon :grin:


Haha, the best one so far. : D


Every time I see the letter opener in our office I’m remembered of “The Showstopper” and the countless NPCs I killed with it. Thankfully our letter opener is dull-edged, so the risk of getting stabbed to death by a bald clone assassin is rather low.


At a boardroom meeting I attended recently…

Presenter: “So each of you will be issued keycards for the turnstile and the elevators. The keycards will be coded so that you can access only the floors assigned to you.”

Me: “And what happens if someone were to… forget their keycard?”

Presenter: “They wouldn’t be able to enter the building, sir…”

Me: “But the building has a fire escape… That opens in both directions.”

Presenter: “You seem to know a lot about going where you’re not supposed to.”

Me: “You have no idea.” :wink:


I’m a law student, going to be a lawyer in 2 years time, so I’ll probably get murdered by a bald man soon given that the recent HITMAN has an affinity of murdering attorneys.


Every time I see someone leaning on a railing from an elevated height, it makes me want to push them over so badly.


I always see this guy in that fb group, I thought he ate that poisoned cake.

  • After playing Paris for a few times, I suddenly realize there’re more than 10 chandeliers in my house.
  • Everytime I’m at the main hall in my school, I always stare at the speakers and stage lights hanging under the ceiling.


That’s a lot of chandeliers. We have one above the dinner table.


Literally just drove past a Church on my way home from work tonight and saw a group of nuns outside the Church. Couldn’t grab a photo as I was driving, but looked basically like this…

Hahahaha I don’t know what they were doing, but it really made me wanna scream “The Saints are coming…RUN!!!”


I don’t know why I notice these things. Sadly that song isn’t indie rock. :^(


I also get the same feeling with fire alarms…
Obviously I don’t trigger them though… :wink:


“I need to use the bathroom”


I saw a closet at a cafe once and the first thing I wanted to do was to hide in it.


Lmao at the grocery store and just heard a mother yell out to her child “Rocco!” Hahaha of all names… And she said it in an annoyed tone as well! :joy:


Just now:

Got past security in a building by claiming that “I need to use the bathroom.”



Some of you may remember this one from the old forum.

Drunk 47…

(That Psycho Beer is strong stuff!)


so,thats the extended Version of the Blood Money Cutscene, where Diana rams a Syringe in his Shoulder :thinking::joy: