Hitman Moments IRL


#22

When you’re called up out of the blue to do a phone survey and they ask for your name, just tell them that names are for friends, so you don’t need one. Then hang up.


#23

I was out driving earlier today and the car infront of me had the Hitman insignia decal on his rear window like this one

Funny thing is, I have a similar one on my car too. I honked the horn at him at a red light and he looked at me funny.

Then when the light was green and I made my way infront of him, he must have seen mine because he honked as well :joy: I looked through my rear view mirror and he give me a thumbs up lmao :sunglasses::+1:

Ahh… “Another Brother…” Lol


#24

The other week i thought i’d help the missus with the dinner and i asked what she wanted me to do, she asked me to keep stirring the sauce in the pan, quick as a flash i replied “sure thing boss, i’ll give it some love”.

Needless to say she did not get it but it kinda made my day… she’ll probably leave me soon :grin:


#25

Haha, the best one so far. : D


#26

Every time I see the letter opener in our office I’m remembered of “The Showstopper” and the countless NPCs I killed with it. Thankfully our letter opener is dull-edged, so the risk of getting stabbed to death by a bald clone assassin is rather low.


#27

At a boardroom meeting I attended recently…

Presenter: “So each of you will be issued keycards for the turnstile and the elevators. The keycards will be coded so that you can access only the floors assigned to you.”

Me: “And what happens if someone were to… forget their keycard?”

Presenter: “They wouldn’t be able to enter the building, sir…”

Me: “But the building has a fire escape… That opens in both directions.”

Presenter: “You seem to know a lot about going where you’re not supposed to.”

Me: “You have no idea.” :wink:


#28

I’m a law student, going to be a lawyer in 2 years time, so I’ll probably get murdered by a bald man soon given that the recent HITMAN has an affinity of murdering attorneys.


#29

Every time I see someone leaning on a railing from an elevated height, it makes me want to push them over so badly.


#30

I always see this guy in that fb group, I thought he ate that poisoned cake.


#31
  • After playing Paris for a few times, I suddenly realize there’re more than 10 chandeliers in my house.
  • Everytime I’m at the main hall in my school, I always stare at the speakers and stage lights hanging under the ceiling.

#32

That’s a lot of chandeliers. We have one above the dinner table.


#33

LMFAO!!
:joy:
Literally just drove past a Church on my way home from work tonight and saw a group of nuns outside the Church. Couldn’t grab a photo as I was driving, but looked basically like this…

Hahahaha I don’t know what they were doing, but it really made me wanna scream “The Saints are coming…RUN!!!”
:laughing:


#34

I don’t know why I notice these things. Sadly that song isn’t indie rock. :^(


#35

I also get the same feeling with fire alarms…
Obviously I don’t trigger them though… :wink:


#36

“I need to use the bathroom”


#37

I saw a closet at a cafe once and the first thing I wanted to do was to hide in it.


#38

Lmao at the grocery store and just heard a mother yell out to her child “Rocco!” Hahaha of all names… And she said it in an annoyed tone as well! :joy:


#39

Just now:

Got past security in a building by claiming that “I need to use the bathroom.”

:sunglasses:


#40

Some of you may remember this one from the old forum.

Drunk 47…

(That Psycho Beer is strong stuff!)


#41

so,thats the extended Version of the Blood Money Cutscene, where Diana rams a Syringe in his Shoulder :thinking::joy: