Sessions with Lafayette (Serious Discussions Only) - Venting Thread


#175

If you’re having trouble breaking old habits than I say you’re best bet would be to ask your mom, other family members and close friends for help. Rather you play on pc or console, you may need to have that taken away.


#176

I’ll be blocking Reddit, Youtube, Yahoo and Hitmanforum for some time so I can concentrate on my studies. See you guys next time.


#177

I got my adult sister to confiscate my laptop until November so I can concentrate on my revision, particularly trigonometry. Wish me luck for the exams!


#178

Hey guys, so serious topic here…going through a bit of a rough time. My husband moved out a little over three weeks ago. We were fighting a lot and I got physical with him a couple of times (while drinking, but still). I said and did some horrible things. I am sooooo sad because I never meant to hurt him so badly. We have been together 16 years, married 8. I cannot imagine my life without him!

For now, I am working intensely with a therapist and on other aspects of anger management. I have a real problem that I thought was under control because I take my meds regularly (I’m bipolar as well). But, it really surfaced during tough times that we were having and I really dislike the person I am when I’m angry. He wants me to change for myself first, but it’s hard because I want to change for him. I know I need to do it for myself first though to make it stick. Anyway, this is kind of a ramble but I’m just super sad and miss him.

I’ve told him how sorry I am and everything…he’s been kind enough to hang out here and there with me. But, the thought of never getting him back? It’s the absolute worst feeling in the world. No one compares to him in any way, that I’ve ever met. So, I’m trying to be patient and keep working towards diminishing my anger and getting my emotions under control. I don’t want to go around being out of control anymore. It really sucks that this was my wake up call, but there it is.

I feel like admitting what I did is important, because men get abused too and it’s not often talked about. I would be in jail if I were a guy, let’s just put it that way. I’m lucky he didn’t go that route. Not looking for anyone to say hey it’s okay you aren’t a bad person, I just wanted to post because I needed to vent a little and the more I talk about it, the more responsibility and ownership I am trying to take of the problem.

Thanks for listening guys! This forum and community have helped me through some tough times! <3


#179

I get your feeling of having a lot of anger inside you and that it’s really hard to control at times. It’s specially frustrating when it arrives to a point where you harm people you didn’t wanted to hurt.
You already took a big step into the right direction by searching professional help and I can advice you to look for something that you like to do and helps you to keep relaxed and turn it into a daily activity. For example, if you like plants try gardening or if you like drawing and painting, make your own work.
A final advice: it will be a good thing to leave booze out of the equation for a while. “Anger+Meds+Alcohol” aren’t a winner combo.


#180

Oh yeah, forgot to mention, I stopped drinking for the time being, no plans to start again soon!

Edited to add: Thanks for your kind words Scm! I beary much appreciate the reply! :slightly_smiling_face:


#181

My partner and I have been in a relationship for almost fifteen years now, so a similar amount of time.

I think it’s safe to say for a partnership that long, there will have undoubtedly been some rocky periods throughout that time. While not knowing your circumstances, so hesitant to give specific advice, what I would keep in mind is that we’ve all potentially said or done things in the heat of the moment that we regret (however extreme). Relationships that long have depth to them and very strong ties, so perhaps in the times you do meet up with your hubby try and make it about rebuilding the friendship and mending the bond between you first (without seeming too desperate for it to work, if that makes sense).

While it might hurt, try to communicate as much as possible without being too apologetic; focus on the present then the future, and stay positive as very few relationships are irreconcilable. Good luck with it; I’ll be sending some positive vibes your way. :mage:


#182

Rock soild.

I been with my partner 7 years only extra bit I can add on this is to always work on your listening skills. So like when trying to reconcile after an argument or whatever I find it goes smoother if I take a moment to repeat to my partner what I think I hear her say. So something like “Okay, so you are saying you felt disrespected when I didn’t offer you a chair.”

So that the other person can feel and know you aren’t just trying to rebut them.

I am sure they will have much to express so making sure they feel heard goes a long way.


#183

Also great advice; with the pace at which we communicate these days, it’ll never hurt to take a few extra moments to get a better understanding of where people are coming from (especially loved ones).


#184

Im out of likes for today, but thanks for all the advice guys! I really appreciate the responses, makes me feel less alone.

@Ed_ll3 great advice. Thanks so much for your thoughtful reply. And, what you said about focusing on the present! Yes! That’s one of my biggest problems and something I’m working on. If you aren’t present, you can’t control your emotions in the moment. Also, you miss out on so much too. I tend to be a past or future type person. So, I’m doing mindfulness techniques/training. And, rebuilding our friendship first is really important. We’ve been through some rocky roads, especially financially, but I am hopeful we can get through this too.

Thanks again guys <3


#185

Well said @Ed_ll3. I was thinking the same before I read your post.

You shouldn’t ignore the past but it shouldn’t be the focus. Present and future.

Also, there’s no overnight quick fix. It will take time so don’t keep reassessing the situation from one day to the next and become hopeful or depressed based on each encounter or conversation. (I know that’s VERY difficult to do.) But it’s a long haul that will likely see some ups and downs along the way. I wish you the best.


#186

Thanks for that FantumX, my friend. It’s great advice. It’s like a rollercoaster…one moment I’m like okay, I can do this, the next I’m bawling my eyes out. But it’s so true, I just need to focus on the present and take it one day at a time. Patience is something I really need to practice!


#187

A finally managed to make this! I’m so happy :relaxed:


It took me 2 months to gain confidence and record the audio for this video, I’m very happy :rofl:
This happened because of my sister who explained me that its nothing, just speaking on a mic which for some reason gave me a lot of confidence (even though I knew it isn’t that hard of a task) so I started recording it and finished it :slight_smile:
But because I was rushing it some stuff was left out, for example discussion of the bike driving mechanics in both the games, Aiden’s ability ‘focus’ which slowed down time and gave you the opportunity to 360 noscope, distract button in WD2 which distracted an enemy npc by sending text messages to their phones even when they’re detecting you which didn’t make that much sense, there was a lot more, but I’m happy that I did it.
Even though my sister helped me a lot, I’m a little angry at her because she threw my Deus Ex: Mandkind Divided steelbook on the floor and broke it :persevere:
IMG_20170830_160655
IMG_20170830_160708
My video gathered 100 views, 10 likes, 2 positive comments and a whopping watch time of 200 minutes in just 2 days :blush:
Screenshot_2017-08-30-16-09-15
I also left my school and am now doing home/open schooling, I will tell more later :slight_smile:


#188

Well a very bad thing happened today :frowning:

So today I wanted to replay Dishonored 2 because Dishonored: Death of The Outsider is coming out next week. I had once previously completed it, then deleted it to free space for some other game. So I got the disk and put it in the PS4. I launched it and a 12GB update :persevere: started downloading. I clicked on new game and it asked for a save slot, I had used the first slot the first time I played the game but for some reason it showed the file as corrupted data. I used the second slot. The first chapter A Long Day in Dunwall started loading. But when it was half way through, it crashed a message appeared ‘Cannot continue application. Cannot read disk, make sure the disk is not damaged or dirty’ I closed it and did the same thing over and over again but the exact thing happened every time. So I waited for the update to download(which took 3 hours :disappointed_relieved:) after that I opened the application, the tittle screen(not the main menu) appeared and bam it crashed again, displaying the same cannot read disk message, but the sound/music of the game could be heard in the background(sound of Bethesda intro, Arkane Studios intro, Void Engine intro and then the main menu music) I clicked on close application and for a second there was the main menu of the game appeared on the screen but then it closed. I kept launching the game over and over again but the same disk error kept appearing. I took wet cloth and cleaned my disk, but still no luck :disappointed_relieved:
So then I looked up for some disk cleaning methods on the net and found that you could cleanna disk with a toothpaste(the disk had some scratches but not a lot) so I cleaned the disk with a toothpaste, deleted/reinstalled the game, tried a ton of solutions people wrote on the net, but still no luck.

I’ve updated the game 2 times and I don’t want to again because that’ll take 36 GB from my 90 GB WiFi :frowning: I don’t want to buy another copy either :disappointed_relieved:

What do I do?


#189

Maybe go to the store and switch your copy?


#190

I bought the game in May and ordered it online. I’m pretty sure the retailer won’t take the disk back :(:sob:
Thanks for the help :slight_smile:


#191

Well, in case ur wondering, no u won’t need D2 to play Death of the outsider, and if u finished tha game already, just watch some videos to remember the story and stuff :slight_smile:


#192

Hey, guys. My brother just failed his exams so he wants our Windows computer taken down so he could go concentrate on his schoolwork. I’m kinda upset, but if this is what he wants, so be it. I better start sharping up too, my mother’s getting a heart attack just thinking about us. I’m going to be taking a year break from Hitman. See you all next time. Markie out.


#193

best wishes in your schooling.


#194

Best of luck, although I don’t think taking away the pc will help too much🤔