The Ultimate Hitman Memes Thread


But no animation tho


Hitman fans general reaction after season 1 full launch.


Had some time to kill, decided to redesign the Hitman 2 cover. Finally gave it a subtitle too! :wink:


HITMAN 2: Play-Doh Edition.


Man, this really just nails it.

Like what illogical thought process do you have to go through to not realise that you’re going to confuse not just search results, but also people by re-using “Hitman 2”.


oh, Father Vittiorio? Thats a huge letdown, i wanted Campbell Sturrock as a playable Character :frowning:


How hard could it be to come up with a subtitle,seriously?
Just adding some random word would have worked better than this.
Calling it Hitman 7 would have made more sense


I am and had been for a while utterly convinced the franchise has been retconned. So at this point I find it unsurprising.


Sturrock isn’t exactly the best partner to have, since he can only work from his bed. So he would have to be wheeled in to get close to the targets.

Though, on the positive side he only wants to be paid with roasted chickens. :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:


Gulp… :chicken:

20 roasted chickens


Well, he could ride on one of this Scooters -available in the KrugerSchmidt Shop :joy:


I miss my old Pistolmouse FPS…


Apologies for momentarily going off-topic with this post, but welcome to the forums, @Diamondback. Your story about a Psychology professor asking you to play Hitman 2 Silent Assassin for credit on your profile page is the first time I’ve ever heard of something like that happening, especially with a Hitman game. That teacher must have been kind of cruel, and the class difficult, because that game’s not exactly the easiest to play in the series :rofl:.

Anyway, I don’t think I’d be alone in saying I’m intrigued to hear the details behind that story (what did the instructor expect you to learn from the game/what were you studying that tied into the game/details of the assignment/etc.). You’re free to introduce yourself, get to know other members, and explain how you got into the series in the linked thread, only if you’re interested in doing so. It just sounds like a unique experience to talk about, and I’m certain others would like to hear about it. Otherwise, welcome! :slight_smile:

Okay, with that said, let’s get back on topic.


Offtopic: Actually, it wasn’t for class, but for outside work since his entire Department had made me their pet project helping me put my head back together. Part of it was that since I was entering a brief but successful career in Executive Protection (you might say “the anti-47”), I was having trouble squaring things between “Thou Shalt Not Kill” and the knowledge that preserving the life of the young lady Principal entrusted to my overwatch could require ending the life of the stalker who’d tried to kill her twice and nearly succeeded once.

E.'s (I always change names or use initials, both to protect the innocent and the not-so-much, as well as to protect my own anonymity) point with H2 was “You do what you have to do to protect your friends and family”–the point wasn’t the game itself, but 47’s character development and the lengths he went to to save his friend Father Vittorio. It did its job, and helped me snap into the version of a “Grim Reaper persona” I needed to fulfill my own task with clear conscience–and also helped because I regularly found myself, while protecting her, asking “What would 47 do in my shoes if restricted to a Defensive Counter-Assassin ruleset?”* (Side story: while we didn’t work out, before a catastrophic nervous breakdown I had been very close to E.'s daughter when we were children, and even though I dropped out of sight for a while afterward he’d taken point on my overhaul-from-the-neck-up mainly because she asked him to for the memory of the long-gone person I had been with her and trying to salvage some of the better pieces of the “old” me and put them back together as part of the “new.”)
*Obviously, if left to his own devices 47’s preferred technique for keeping a Principal (EP-speak for “protect-ee”) safe would be to Do What He Does Best to the threats before they have a chance to make their own moves, but…

Apologies and not to drift–if anybody wants to dig into this, while there are some questions I simply don’t have answers to (I am, after all, basically held together on Duct Tape Psychology, but there must have been something done right about the “battlefield repairs” for me to still have a normal life running on them fifteen years later) and others I won’t for reasons of protecting my anonymity I’m willing to start a new thread over in Intros for it…

We now return to your regularly scheduled topic. :slight_smile: And back on (one) topic, I personally wish that IO had kept the story consistent, and would revisit the earlier, not-necessarily-new-system-friendly titles by doing full Remastered Editions with the new game-engine. Keep story, general visuals and voice, but maybe rework the details and levels to be more realistic and work better with modern GFX.

Re 47 and Diana: With long enough or close enough working relationships lines do become blurred, potentially even evolving into a kind of co-dependency. It’s somewhat plausible that both being “cut off” from a lot of the rest of society, even with the risks of mixing business and personal 47 and Diana might turn to one another for their social needs–it’s happened with real covert operatives. In the Bond novels, since 007 was an orphan, Admiral Messervy (“M” being the specific codename for Head of MI6 and “Q” being Quartermaster, no matter who held the offices) stepped in as a father-figure and mentor to him, somewhat mirrored in the movies, possibly also reflected by the Judi Dench M’s arc into being a kind of “surrogate mom”.


Thank you for your detailed response and personal, insightful perspective on the games. This seems like a dark, difficult, unexpectedly personal topic to discuss, so I sincerely apologize for bringing it up at all. I respect your wish to remain anonymous, and with the dangerous nature of being in protection detail, both for you and those under your watch, I’d feel the same way in your shoes. I’ve always found Silent Assassin to be one game that has a lot of moral depth and fiber to it, and few would expect that, given the mature, violent nature of it, so it’s always cool to hear someone bring it up as a “learning experience” rather than just being a “fun game.” There are lessons the game can teach. It can help us become better people by discovering the sanctity of life, even though it’s the straightforward story of a contract killer hired to take life away. I think it also teaches people of the value of sticking up for those who, in 47’s own words, “never failed” his “trust,” as you clearly described. You make some excellent points in your account.

Anyway, in short, if I was in a situation like you, in deciding between the moral obligation to always preserve life and the tragic necessity of sometimes taking one to save another, I’d probably look to that game as well. Thank you for your comments.

Now, I won’t attempt to derail this thread any farther, like the bad person I am. Let’s all get back to more funny memes.


COD: Our game is so broken, we have a limited time weapon you can only get out of supply drops with pure luck, and if you don’t get it, it’ll never come back again!

Fortnite: Our game is so broken, shotguns can do 7 damage!

Hitman: Hold my rubber ducky.





This… This is so beautiful



Oh my God lmao I’m literally in tears from laughing so hard hahaha that was so so accurate :joy::joy::joy: