Yesterday I decided to cease use of Discord dot com. This meant I left every server I was currently in - including f7sc, Hitmaps and Lego Stuffers. I originally hinted at this earlier, but now I am no longer willing to invest my time spent into this anymore.
tw / Mean-spirited Complaints
Many people here may not know this, but I was appointed mod at f7sc via their “Security” role - smaller mod privileges that could only mute and remove messages (and only now could ban and kick people for some reason). Obviously me leaving the server concluded that I am resigning there as well for the time being.
At first I thought I could get back to business and focus my efforts to Hitman again. Now, I feel that I am no longer welcome in a place I supposedly liked. There are people in the Hitman community residing on Discord that I wish could settle quarrels with. But I can’t. Because nobody gives a shit whenever I try to be genuine with my answers.
When I left, I realised I was better off without the site anymore. I didn’t want to return back. I didn’t want to elaborate further. I felt at peace for once. I am confident that I won’t be returning back for a while, probably indefinitely.
On Discord, forgiveness isn’t a goal in mind. It is treated as an afterthought. All of you who shittalk about specific people behind their back somehow makes it ok with you. And this isn’t about the one time you had an inconvenient user ask you a stupid question. You do this to everybody who has the slightest of disapproval. It chews you up, fractures your flimsy ego, and then you eventually forget about it one month down the line to prey on the next victim for forgiveness.
You can call it petty. You can call it dumb. I don’t really care. All I want is people to feel normal, and civilised, and calm. To feel like they can achieve things. To feel like they have a whole lot to tell stories than “I just went for a drinking night and got to hook up with this girl’s Snapchat”. I don’t want to be told to give up, to accept whatever half-ass reason you think is best for me. I want to feel like myself.
I have no real reason to return back to a place where I feel unwelcome, people shittalk about people behind their back, and serves as a distraction from the boring things in life to bitch about boring people. As such I won’t be returning back to f7sc, Hitmaps and Lego Stuffers, until I feel welcomed back. I am confident that I won’t be missed however - you have a good habit of bitching about people regardless.