Quartz Memes Maximizer - Featured Contracts Submissions Thread(closed)

[BlossomFox]

I’m rooting for this one!
Also, here is the Blahaj mod if anyone wants the link: Blahaj at Hitman 3 Nexus - Mods and community

[Fenixsandr]

Creator name: Fenixsandr
Contract ID: 1-26-2646960-29
Platform: Epic
Contract Title: Coconut or sharp?
Targets: The girl in the pool and the girl bartender from the pool bar. There are 2 falling objects, a coconut and a shark. I drew a girl from the pool to the bar and dropped one shark on two targets. But I think there are other options.

[zubin47]

• Creator name: Zubin47

• Contract ID: 2-09-7066029-31

• Platform: Playstation

• Contract Title: My Target Practice Vlog

• Contract Briefing:

• Contract Details:

The targets are the three militia spec ops practicing on firing range in the Colorado map.
The optional complications are - pistol, headshot only and perfect shooter.

• A short description of the contract:

This contract is inspired by the talent and dedication of the exceptionally skilled athlete who made headlines worldwide, despite being a runner-up. Last year, viral memes about him flooded the internet.

@Quartz_tan Please review this and let me know if there is any copywrites on this briefings and I shall modify it accordingly.

• Meme you reference:

[Melusca]

• Creator name: Melusca

• Contract ID: 1-18-043018563

• Platform: PC (Steam)

• Contract Title: I need to use the bathroom

• Contract Briefing: The GAMA Hospital’s toilets are once again out of order, and it looks like none of the handymen are interested in fixing them. Thankfully, we have a few ways to get them to go back to work. While we’re at it, let’s have a couple of guards inspect the security system, it seems like the cameras could use some improvements.

• Contract Details (screenshot with targets/kill conditions/complications,like fan made contract topic):

• A short description of the contract: A SONKO in Hokkaido (Patient Zero) based on accidents, mostly drowning. Obviously the best way to drown people in this game is to lead them to toilets.

• Meme you reference: I think most people on this forum will be familiar with it, but since it’s part of the rules, it’s obviously referencing this famous line from C47.

I took that screenshot for the contract thumbnail but honestly it’s not that great, so the C47 pic (minus the subtitles) would probably work better.

[Tetrafish_21]

• Creator name: Tetrafish_21
• Contract ID: 1-30-1776138-21
• Platform: Epic
• Contract Title: Microscopic-Devices, Kid!
• Contract Briefing:

Good evening Mr. Rieper… Or is that Mr. Ripper?

Our client, Mr. L. Bolt (no relation to the 4th target) has tracked down 5 former guards from an underground facility that was busted for harvesting brains 7 years ago. Since the client can’t make it there in person, he’s asked you to act on his behalf and finish the job.

They say that violence breeds violence. Kind of like when you shoot near guards and they become hostile.

Good Luck and Adios Amigo!

• Contract Details
• 
• A short description of the contract (optional,just tell me why I should pick your contract as FC,how fit your contract and the meme): I hope you like it.
• Meme you reference: The contract title is a play on the phrase “Nanomachines, son!” Like I said, this references a game that is known for its memes.

Suggested screenshot or pics to use…

I hope this is okay. I don’t think it uses anything that should be copyrighted, it just references it.

Edit: I almost had one of the sewer exits as a required exit (that’s a reference to the “Adios Amigos!” line) but wasn’t sure if that would fail if you didn’t have a crowbar. I also wanted no disguise change, but that’s fine if a player needs to get around to get to some of the targets.

Edit: Note for making this into a drawing… Could they put in an electricity effect along the blade?

Similar to this

[zubin47]

• Creator name: Zubin47

• Contract ID: 2-11-1554270-31

• Platform: Playstation

• Contract Title: Blank Meme Templates

• Contract Briefing:

• Contract Details and Meme you reference:

Here is the target locations and its meme mappings:

The targets are scattered in the map:

• A short description of the contract:

As mentioned in briefing, I was running out of meme ideas so I have submitted blank meme templates resembling targets and scenarios in Miami map.
Also since there is no contents in it so it is safe from copyrights, explicit, politics, discrimination etc etc and hence maybe we can consider it as a meme.
I thought of adding optional complication of no pacification but then I thought it might add some difficulties in the playthroughs so I removed it.

[Vicks]

Creator name: VickS

Contract ID: 2-08-3383945-40

Platform: Playstation

Contract Title: FIRE FRENZY

[ChRoNiCSmk305]

Florida Man: Gator-Less and Furious

Location: Miami (The Finish Line)
Disguise (Optional): Flamingo Mascot
Targets: Marcus Bellamy, Brittany Mayes, Leta Boyce, Nickolas Elliott
Eliminations (Optional): Explosion Accidents
Complications (Optional): No Pacifications, Do Not Get Spotted

---

Briefing:

• 47s Thought:
  Patience and precision have always defined me. But today, I find myself embracing a different philosophy. They served me cold fries, a stale burger, and a flat soda. Unacceptable. An alligator would have made the perfect statement, but I left it at home. A miscalculation.
  Instead, I will settle for something more… explosive. When the flames die down and the air clears, one thing will remain; a lesson in customer service.

---

About the Contract:

This is inspired by the legendary Florida Man meme, specifically the infamous alligator through the fast food drive-thru window incident, but this contract takes it to the next level. A full-blown revenge mission in true Hitman fashion.

Why Play This Contract?

• The Flamingo Mascot disguise perfectly embodies the chaotic Florida Man energy—absurd, over-the-top, and a little unhinged.
• The explosion-only kills force players to be creative, using environmental hazards or placed explosives for maximum mayhem.
• The complications—no pacifications and no getting spotted—mean you can’t just brute-force your way through. Strategic movement and well-timed execution are key.

This contract blends meme-worthy fun with genuine challenge, rewarding clever planning and execution. Whether you go full mayhem mode or execute perfectly planned chaos, one thing is certain. Miami will never forget this Florida Man.

---

Contract Image:

For the contract image, I submitted a screenshot of 47 throwing a fish at a food vendor, but if possible, I’d love to see a more Miami-inspired version of it. Imagine 47 in his Miami outfit, mid-throw, but instead of a fish, he’s launching an alligator at the vendor. That would perfectly capture the Florida Man chaos and really drive home the meme-worthy energy of the contract!

Contract ID: 1-11-2577920-96
Platform: Epic

[teddyfilmore]

Memes within memes!!

[teddyfilmore]

Creator name: teddyfilmore
Contract ID: 2-21-6069380-84
Platform: Playstation
Contract Title: Stop, Drop and Rickroll
Contract Briefing and Details:

A short description of the contract:

A quick combo of the widely spread fire safety technique and the lyrics that inspired the famous Rickroll meme/gif. Complications are included to increase difficulty and encourage SONKO play style. No disguise was specified to allow for maximum routing variations.

Meme you reference:

[gamesquad186]

Creator name: gamesquad186
Contract ID: 3-02-7108026-65
Platform: Xbox
Contract Title: Viktor Novikov’s Good Day
Contract Briefing:

Contract Details (screenshot with targets/kill conditions/complications,like Fan made contract topic):

Good evening 47. Your targets are: Valarie St Claire, cutthroat publisher and potential blackmailer: Sophus Fatale, advisor of Dalia Margolis; and Andrea Martinez, public face of the Delgado Cartel. I must admit 47 that this isn’t a standard contract, but our client views the three as a substantial risk towards Novikov’s happiness, and by extension the client’s employment. The ICA has also requested Martinez’s elimination. We don’t want another “Undying” on our hands. Happy Hunting 47.

A short description of the contract:
I have been playing Hitman for about 6 months now, and by god do I love it. I only recently learned that there was a forum and a great community here. I think it’d be pretty neat to have a contract of mine featured on my favourite videogame.

(TL;DR: Having a featured contract on my favourite videogame would be wild.)

Meme you reference: (MUST HAVE.with a picture or video link will be good,will base that draw thumbnails and check the meme you use is following rules)

SAD VIKTOR:

HAPPY VIKTOR:

*This is taken from the in-game cutscene after The Showstopper. I feel like 47 in his clown suit would also work well too."
Inspired by this post: https://www.reddit.com/r/HiTMAN/

[magicdave94]

Creator name: magicdave94
Contract ID: 1-33-7294287-84
Platform: Steam
Contract Title: Hedgedoh
Contract Briefing and Details:

A short description of the contract:

A 4-target any/any on DGS, with 2 guards and 2 guests. 2 near each other, 2 opposite sides of the mansion. 3 targets are mobile, within a quite limited range, and the other one is static but has ways to eliminate him without any complicated isolation.

I thought of adding hide bodies comp for the ‘hiding in the bushes’ idea but decided against it as it felt too limiting so no complications.

Meme you reference:
Homer receding into the bushes meme

Although it’s a reference to Simpsons I don’t believe it infringes any copyright as I have not used any direct names etc.

[THAT]

I thought of making a “I Studied The Blade” contract on Bangkok, requiring you to kill someone with the katana while dressed as the stalker, but it’s just an unfun map in general. The other map with a similar disguise is Berlin as the drug dealer, though you’d have to bring your own katana.

Happy for anybody to grab this idea or workshop it further.

[Fenixsandr]

@THAT, There are also katanas in Sapienza and in Hokkaido. There are even two on the island of S’gaile. There are tantos in New York and Chongqing. So there are other places for ‘I studied the blade.’

[THAT]

The outfit is super important though because the Stalker and Dealer both wear fedoras. And I’d like it to be on a ‘party’ map like Bangkok or Sgail, so “While you were partying, I studied the blade”

[magicdave94]

Berlin has the scrap sword could use that.

[Fenixsandr]

Ok. Blake’s hat and Fire Phoenix (like Show, Party)? Priest disguise in Sapi? public enemy suit, tactical gear whit hanter’s hat?

[linux_penguin]

@THAT

The outfit is super important though because the Stalker and Dealer both wear fedoras.

The dealer has a bucket hat, like a real fashionista. Still probably the best disguise on the map for that idea with the shades and big coat, though.

[Tetrafish_21]

The Rave On suit wouldn’t work?

[teddyfilmore]

In the spirit of @THAT, here’s one that hasn’t been used I’m not sure what to do with.

I wrote down INSERT BULLET HERE and “To be the best hitman, one must always be mindful.”

Feels prime for headshots/sniping but other creators have been far more successful at making those types of contracts fresh and exciting (and playable, haha). If the idea inspires you, it’s yours.