Thanks swang 
As it stands, I donāt want to think about looking for another job right now. Donāt even want to consider it.
I like this job I have. Its not entirely fun all the time, but the people are nice and the consistency in shifts my manager has tried to keep me in has been nice.
It also pays pretty well with some great insurance so thatās a good bonus.
If you asked him to not involve you anymore, where is the dilemma? That you actually want to help him by being part of it?
That and the fact that he might be involving me without prior notice in a way that Iād be left uncalled. Next time will surely be his last time though, I have the options to make sure of that.
Had a chat with my mom, and while I do know that Iām a lot less stressed than I was in the first 3 months of having this job ā I canāt deny that Iām still probably living in a anxious state while at work, as itās just what the job demands of me and what I need to do to get through it. But Iāve been in this anxious state so much, I just donāt notice itā¦ yet others I guess do, and itās affecting themā¦
Maybe I need to get medicated after allā¦
Hey @TheChicken hope youāre feeling a bit better. I think it is clear that you have put a lot of thought in to the pros and cons of your job. I am also glad that it sounds like you have a supportive manager and you work with people you like.
I just wanted to add to what Swang said. Job hunting can be very hard and stressful, especially when jobs offering mere minimum wage and no benefits think they are entitled to an employeeās full dedication and loyalty. I hate constantly having to retype up my CV for websites that demand I fill in their pointless questions and refuse me just uploading my CV. For 2 jobs I applied for recently, jobs I actually did really want, I ended up doing the applications at the last possible minute due to how much stress it caused me, even with me actively wanting the position.
But I do want to throw up the suggestion that it might be an idea to occasionally do some casual job hunting. By that I mean, go on Google, go on a popular job site (in the UK would be a site like Indeed), search within 10 miles or so, and just see what comes up. Sometimes it can be worth just seeing what is out there, and seeing what jobs do exist. Obviously youāll get lots of results for your typical stuff like retail, but sometimes you can find more obscure jobs that might make you think that it could suit you. It doesnāt hurt to look.
Personally, I could never be a barista. I worked for Subway and Greggs (a UK coffee sandwich pastry chain) and lost both jobs because I was never fast enough. I just didnāt have the natural quickness those jobs demand. My manager for Greggs was bad, all she did was increase my anxiety and criticise me alot for not learning the job fast enough. I was told to do upselling to customers at the checkout. Like if they were buying a coffee, say they could get a deal if they bought a pastry with the coffee. They said I would be evaluated on this, so I made sure to memorise all the deals and always brought up with every customer I served. My manager criticised me for sounding like a robot to everyone we served because of this.
It can be hard, and it is obvious you are putting alot into it. I think you should at least be proud of the fact youāve nearly got a yearās service under you now. Iām sorry to hear you are so anxious and stressed.
Stay safe. I finished watching Bluey on Disney+ by the way and need to write about it at some point. Very good show.
Aw thank you, buddy 
Iām dealing with a lot right now, and currently still got my mind on checking what the Accessibility group can do when I call them this week, and what Iāll need to talk about with my therapist when I see her, but I guess I can see what I can do about looking into a cursory search of jobsā¦
Itās always been a tedious process with confusion on what I might like/be fit for, vs. what I should attempt to get just in caseā¦
Thanks for confiding in having a similar experience too. Itās silly to only think of it now, but itās good to know that not everyone is best at this kind of stuff, and donāt always hold onto the job easily either. Sorry you couldnāt keep up too 
You finished 3 seasons of Bluey eh? Thatās likeā¦ 150 episodes.
Iām only 2/3rds through Season 2. And thatās like over the course ofā¦ idk I think a year? Wow, you did that fast.
Episodes are short but I like to ration them out if ya get me.
Alright.
So since late July my Aunt and her two kids aka my Cousins have been staying with us. They kinda just showed up out of the blue despite us telling them they canāt stay with us because we simply donāt have the space for three other people and weāve been trying to keep the house as quiet as possible since thatās how we like it. Iāve made more than enough comprises during their stay that I wonāt get into here.
My Aunt has been pushing our limits these last three weeks simply because sheād run off into the city and disappear over night doing things she shouldnāt be doing leaving her youngest with us. Iāve already made it clear she can no longer run off doing what she is doing because we both have jobs in which she canāt take advantage of us like this. I already moved our spare key to the house somewhere new where only the people who actually need to know where it is know. My aunt is well aware that if she continues doing what she is doing she isnāt welcomed back.
Well today she ran off into the city again and took her kid just to put us in a moral dilemma. We canāt lock a 7 year old out. Well she came back and brought a kitten too. As much as I love animals I am livid that she didnāt speak with us first simply cause we donāt have the space let alone time to look after one.
She is well aware that her time with us is temporary and isnāt a permanent solution to her housing. Weāve tried getting her government assistance but she denied it cause she didnāt wanna move north and weāve been giving her various ads and numbers of apartments for rent nearby to which theyāve been falling on deaf ears.
Her youngest isnāt disciplined (timeout, getting grounded, tablet/toys taken away) so most nights itās a lot of crying and and screaming matches to which I only involve myself when I absolutely have to which I have intervene and told my aunt that she (her daughter) has to come home with her home work folder and do her school work. If she doesnāt then Iām gonna have to start taking away stuff that her daughter uses that I pay for (Disney+, Internet Access, Etc).
Iām just beyond annoyed that I have to start parenting my 7 year old cousin and by extension my 46 year old aunt. My aunt knows she has til the end of October to find a permanent solution to her housing which I feel three months is more than enough to figure out a solution.
Had a talk with my therapist. Good talk. Have a better plan for what to do now.
Iām still not doing too good and very anxious tonight tho. Please send virtual hugs.
Edit: I may have just posted a hype comment in the PS thread but really Iām just restless and stressed tonight.
Stay strong man.
Feeling bad during the night vs. the day feels worse somehow. Iām sorry. I hope by now that you at least feel a little better, Chicken 
That sounds miserable and youāre a better soul than I am.
Glad to hear youāre receiving professional help, itās always the better idea. Get better soon
Weāre at the point now where weāre gonna have to call children and youth cause she ran off with her kid again last night without saying anything while I was mowing the lawn.
She went to the city and was doing things she shouldnāt be doing especially with a 7 Year old around. My Aunt didnāt get home til 10:30-11 last night (keep in mind the little one has school im the morning and didnāt do her homework yet.)
Iām gonna be chewing my aunt out when I get home from work. Iāll be taking the little one for ice cream alone and see what she has to say just so I can get a grasp of the situation before we report anything.
Youāre good people for trying your best to house your aunt and your cousins like that, but its horrible how sheās taken advantage of you too.
It sounds like a really awkward and tense situation with how often she just leaves her kids in your care.
I have no idea what advice I could give you but Iām glad to hear youāre not afraid to stand your ground where possible. 
Actually before I deleted it my earlier comment had a second part that went something like āmaybe just get DCFS to come take the kid away. Then you can boot the aunt out and not feel bad.ā
Anyway Iām glad you have an action plan.
At the end of the day she is forcing our hands despite the warnings we gave. The childās well-being matters to me more and itās tough situation but morally speaking as an adult I have to do the right thing and get the child out of a situation that will harm her growth.
I have recently been exposed to some shock sites and NSFL content, I did not look at any of these sites purposely, many of them were bait-and-switch. I will not say or link what the sites were for the safety of you guys, but im just shook and traumatized from what was on these sites (will not share this either)
Itās war now, and I canāt even process it, my group chats are flooded with missing people, friends that live in the south told me that they canāt leave their homes due to shots outside and social media is blasted with dead people and videos of terrorists running around in the streets.
I got called back to the base and I couldnāt even be upset about it āruining my weekendā considering everything that goes on, I keep hearing about friends of friends of friends that got murdered or kidanapped, hearing about people that luckily got away from the party at Berry, and some that didnāt had luck, this is scary, really scary, I just want this war to be over with, my heart is pounding while I write this, I just canāt do it.
Take care of you and your family mate. My brother in law is at University of Jerusalem. I am concerned about him as well. He went there this year to pursue higher education.
War is hell. Wishing you the best. Where are you, if I may ask? Obviously youāre in Israel/Palestine but I donāt know your story.