I fucking hate having really bad ADHD. I feel like Iām already behind in school because I literally keep forgetting things, even if I write it down. This thing is like a fucking curse. How the hell am I supposed to live like this?
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No idea why I psyched myself out with nervousness this morning before my Starbucks shift. Im there now and itās been a decent time so far. Still a bit nervous about everything, but I know the basics of the main positionsā¦
Just kinda sucks i gave myself a minor fright this morning over something just overblown
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If itās any consolation, Iām 36 and also have ADHD and have made it this far. Youāll get there too.
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Guys, someone please respond to this. Anyone. I need help. I need advice. Please. I just got in a huge political argument with my parents where they were saying really racist stuff about black people and think that billionaires are oppressed and that their oppression is just as bad as black peopleās oppressions. I called them out on these statements and they refused to accept their ignorance. Then, I called my dad an asshole for being so racist and saying that black people arenāt oppressed and that they cry too much about being oppressed and ignorant about the oppression of black people. They literally made generalized racist statements, yet tried to say they arenāt racist. He threatened to slap me and was about to do it but stopped himself because of mom. They got into a heated yelling match with me and my mom said it was my fault that my dad threatened to slap me because I called him an asshole and said he was justified for threatening me. I tried criticizing them before calling my dad an asshole, but they made my opinions seem stupid even though I am supposed to respect their opinions. My mom kept gaslighting me and making her and dad out to be the victims and pulled that whole, āWe should be allowed to have different opinions!!!ā shtick. God forbid I criticize my parents for being racist. (Also, my dad and mom consistently use the n word around the house while not being black and my dad makes a lot of racist jokes too and I have to keep quiet on a lot of it or this shit happens.) She basically implied that she and dad was free from criticism and are allowed to be hypocrites because they pay for stuff for me. I want to leave the house and run away for a few days. But, Iām still a minor (Iām 17). I want to ask to stay at a friendās house for at least one night because I donāt feel loved or safe in this house. Please tell me something to help me, guys, or at least make me feel heard.
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Personally I think emotions are running too high on both sides to be making any hasty decisions you might regret. If itās possible, stay at your friendās place for a day or two and give both you and your parents time to cool off first.
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I went through a very similar thing with my parents more than a year ago, although it was more related to their denial of the COVID pandemic and belief in the whole hoax thing, plus their general support of Donald Trump, but the two states of mind tend to share space, and I know for a fact that my parents are racist. I know because it rubbed off on me and until my late teens, I too was racist and believed a lot of hateful bullshit. Pretty much just grew out of it by my late teens, just in time to meet my wife, who is Mexican, so that worked out. But I know my parents have never really approved of her and itās been tense ever since.
And then last year, hearing their bullshit about the vaccine and the pandemic and everything, it just boiled over and I called them out on their stupid, old ways of thinking. Iāve spoken to them a few times since then, but Iāve given up any hope that theyāll ever be reasonable people again, if they ever were, and pretty much consider myself an orphan who lost his parents to the pandemic, although not in the way most people did. My parents might have been bigoted all along, I now realize, but they were at least reasonable. I donāt know who those two people are now, but my parents as I knew them are gone, and the people under the masks are here now, and I donāt really have a relationship with them anymore. Good riddance, really; Iāve always hated the concept of blood family anyway.
Not the same kind of issue youāre having, but I do get where youāre coming from, and donāt be afraid to call your parents out. If it becomes an issue, thatās on them.
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Iām glad you have a similar experience too. I really am still having to come to terms with the fact that my parents arenāt good people and that them being blood means nothing. I also hate the concept of blood family because then it excuses abusive behaviors and makes the kid have to bow down 24/7 or get threatened. They can do certain things and if you ever call the, out on their hypocrisy, youāre disrespectful or an ungrateful child. Itās awful and I might take @Nazarethās advice to go to a friendās house.
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Christ reading that first thing in the morning, i dont really know what to do there, but maybe back away from your dad for a while and vice versa and hopefully itāll blow over??? 
Sorry to overwhelm you with this. I just needed some quick advice. Right now, Iām waiting till later in the day to see if I can stay by a friendās house because the environment in this house is still so toxic. Just waiting things out currently.
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Good luck to you my friend. Think positive
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So, just a little update on the situation. I basically just spoke to my school counselor about the situation and I wasnāt able to stay at a friendās house and I donāt have family close by that I can go to. So, I did have to go back home but I am trying to distance myself because I donāt want to be antagonized or treated like a bad person for standing up for myself. My parents are already trying to sweep everything like nothing happened and I wonāt let them. Also, child services may open a case based on something my dad has done in the past that has to do with physically attacking my mom. So, thatās that for now. Right now, Iām just trying to find some balance and distance myself a bit to feel more stable.
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Hereās hoping the situation gets settled as peacefully and rightfully as possible for you, with the least amount of negative impact. There are few situations more tense and awkward than to be at odds with oneās parents, and/or someone you live with.
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Itās stuff like this thatās made me rethink that saying ārespect your eldersā in recent years. My parents are far more rational than yours and Heisenbergās and too many others seem to be but after seeing the crazy shit people are allowed to get away with just because theyāre older, Iāve started saying ārespect your elders if they deserve itā and/or ārespect those who deserve itā.
Iāve grown sick and tired of bad people being able to hide behind garbage and then turn things around on others with less power. Good luck with your situation; I hope the CPS stuff works out. Iād say, for now, only spend time at home when you absolutely have to and surround yourself with people that make you feel loved and safe. Lifeās too short to fill it with negativity. I hope things turn out better sooner rather than later.
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I also have grown to detest the respect your elders BS and had to realize that older people donāt always know what the hell they are talking about. Often times, theyāll dig you into a deeper hole than before. Like you said, I will take care of myself and try to stick to those who truly care.
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I promise this is the last update on this situation. So, my parents did end up apologizing and we talked things out, but Iām not ready to forgive them so soon because this isnāt the first time something like this has happened. So, I definitely wonāt act like this is the last time theyāll do it. Also, a CPS person is going to visit me at school today to talk to me. Just want to let you all know that Iām safe and that Iām feeling more stable than before.
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This is probably the least serious issue anyone has ever had on this thread, but:
I have a friend I met at the start of the schoolyear, so about 2 and a half weeks ago. We have one class together.
I am kind of interested in this person, like interested in going out with them. Is this too soon to say something?
Iām kind of a newcomer to the whole dating game (I actually have a 0% rejection rate - cause Iāve never asked anyone).
So I am kind of worried this may be too early to say something, but I also donāt want to ruin this friendship, but I also want to go on knowing that I actually told someone what I think of them instead of never going for it. Does this make sense?
Luckily I wonāt see her again until Friday so I can decide how best to make a fool of myself lol
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This is the most honest (and relatable) sentence Iāve read this yearā¦
Wish you a lucky Friday!
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Hereās a question to ask yourself in regards to this: if you were to do nothing for a while and ignore your feelings and just be their friend, do you think those feelings would go away? And if they did, do you think your desire to be their friend would go away, too? If the answer to the first question is no, or if the answer to both questions is yes, then this friendship is already ruined, because itās not real and wonāt last no matter what you do. That leads to the whole āfriend zoneā controversy and sitcom shenanigans. Itās best early on to make it clear how you feel if you think the feelings wonāt go away, or if you think you canāt just stay friends with them if you donāt pursue more. On the other hand, if you think you can be their genuine friend no matter if you never pursue them, or you do and it doesnāt work out, then you can try waiting a while to see if your feelings go away, or give it a try and find out early on if it wonāt work out and quit that part quickly, allowing you to establish a lasting friendship without issues of uncertainty.
Mind you, this is coming from someone with a 100% success rate with romantic relationshipsā¦ because Iāve only ever had 1 and Iām still in it, so take any advice I give on this subject at your own risk because Iām only speaking intuitively, not from personal experience.
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I have already asked myself that question. Iāve felt this way about other people before and I can still be friends with them (in fact I am still friends with many of them - and the ones Iām not friends with arenāt because of any feelings).
I am a person who can usually, 90% of the time control my feelings and emotions. So I donāt have a problem with putting my feelings aside if theyāre not reciprocated.
So yeah, I can still be friends with people I have feelings for, cause Iāve done it before.
This is the first time Iāve actually felt confident enough to share them though (with anyone. Like Iāve never discussed this type of stuff with anyone in my life)
I actually rarely discuss my feelings or thoughts on anything tbh
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Ok @Heisenberg I donāt want to bother you but I think I need to clarify a little:
Iām not really worried about our friendship from my perspective, Iām more worried about it from her perspective. I donāt want to offend her and I donāt want her to think that Iām only friends for this reason (because thatās not true, I like her on a level thatās independent from my other feelings). Iām probably overcomplicating things and thinking too negatively but hey, it is what it is.
I also have a bit more of a philosophical question for you: do you think itās somewhat natural to develop feelings for friends? I mean thatās how friendships start, because you like someone and spending time with them, right? Youāre not going to be friends with someone you dislike and friendships with no feelings at all are never as strong. Does this make sense? Am I crazy?
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